Newquay In the Top 50........

Mollers · 17 July 2013, 19:14

..crap towns in the UK.

Once a fairly standard seaside town, populated by fishermen and laid back surfers, with a busy summer period when families came to the area to hit the beach, Newquay has now been turned into a southern Blackpool or a British Ibiza.

“During the winter, the weather coming in off the Atlantic turns the town grey and the lack of tourists causes half the shops shut down. The jobs available, tedious at the best of times, disappear until the summer.

“And when the summer arrives, it gets worse. On hot days hung-over meatheads walk around topless in a competition to decide who uses the best steroids and the worst tattooist, hooting like apes at the occasional passing blonde. If it rains, the beaches evacuate and the tiny high street fills to bursting point.

“Parents try to keep their children entertained but as every other shop only sells ‘Newquay Lifeguard’ hoodies, they are fighting a losing battle. The odd couple of pensioners dodge fearfully through herds of school leavers who think the Inbetweeners movie is a documentary.”

A fair review.

matt h · 17 July 2013, 19:32

Ha Ha superb review. Honest as well.

GJ0KYZ · 17 July 2013, 20:12

Is Portsmouth on that list I wonder? I think it was Jonathon Meades who, in his novel "Pompey", described Portsmouth as a "nightmarish grid of brick, set on mud and inhabited by garish freaks". I've only been there once myself and quite liked it actually.

Into The Blue · 17 July 2013, 20:45

Pompey makes the Top 100 which is the initial list from which the Top 50 will be selected
Crap Towns Returns
A few interesting nominations, but Falmouth escapes this time

kerny · 17 July 2013, 20:57

Does this mean that the property is cheap in Newquay then

Mollers · 17 July 2013, 21:05

Quote:

Originally Posted by kerny

Does this mean that the property is cheap in Newquay then

Nope, 'coz retiring Mancs can't wait to sell up and move there. They usually last about two winters.

PeterM · 17 July 2013, 21:18

Quote:

Originally Posted by GJ0KYZ

Is Portsmouth on that list I wonder? I think it was Jonathon Meades who, in his novel "Pompey", described Portsmouth as a "nightmarish grid of brick, set on mud and inhabited by garish freaks". I've only been there once myself and quite liked it actually.

I think you'll find most of the ladies that mollers posted in his tramp stamp thread are from Portsmouth..oh and I'm from there and my family and teenage kids.....but half the family tree is from Alderney do that's ok....oh Portsmouth is a city....

kerny · 17 July 2013, 21:18

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mollers

Nope, 'coz retiring Mancs can't wait to sell up and move there. They usually last about two winters.

Thanks for that M. I might look at moving to Penryn then

seizethemoment · 17 July 2013, 21:59

Don't tar the whole Newquay area with the same brush. I've just spent today on Polly Joke beach. I defy anyone to find a more beautiful uncrowded spot with better sand, a more enticing sea, and a delightful 20 minute shaded sandy level path from a small free National Trust car park. Less than 3 miles from the centre of town.
I suggest many folk who have the 'misfortune' to live in this 'crap' town keep this to themselves and allow the readers of this report to enjoy the delights of the town centre on summer nights!

Mollers · 17 July 2013, 22:04

Quote:

Originally Posted by seizethemoment

Don't tar the whole Newquay area with the same brush.

The whole area is a beautiful piece of coastline. I spent 14 weeks working at Mawgan Porth earlier this year and have become very fond of the place. A very different feel to our side.

The Black Pig · 17 July 2013, 22:07

Newquay always had a rough edge but it sounds as if its a lot worse, twenty years ago we were there for the surfing and a beer after now I think it's a stag a hen weekend location

Mollers · 17 July 2013, 22:16

Quote:

Originally Posted by The Black Pig

Newquay always had a rough edge but it sounds as if its a lot worse, twenty years ago we were there for the surfing and a beer after now I think it's a stag a hen weekend location

25 yrs ago, Fri night at the Bowgie at Crantock was the law. Billy Idol, The Cult, Bottled Tuborg Gold and genuine surf chicks. It was like going to heaven for us Fal boys. :-D

The Black Pig · 17 July 2013, 22:21

Is Bertie's still there? And how about the Newquay arms, it used to rock so much, sweat used to drip into pints from the ceiling

onlyonestone · 17 July 2013, 22:22

I agree even in the last 10 or 15 years the place has become majorly commercialised just for summer. Still I'm off to that neck of the woods in a couple of weeks for a family holiday, will probably pop there for a day with my brother so he can see how much its changed since we used to go years ago.

Adamn · 17 July 2013, 22:52

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mollers

25 yrs ago, Fri night at the Bowgie at Crantock was the law. Billy Idol, The Cult, Bottled Tuborg Gold and genuine surf chicks. It was like going to heaven for us Fal boys. :-D

Totally agree!! Many a good evening spent in the pig sty after a good day surfing the bar behind Vugger Cove.
Not the same feel there now and you can't get scampi and chips for £3:50 either!!

mister p · 18 July 2013, 00:21

There should be a brewery that makes brown ale there.

T 15 · 18 July 2013, 16:33

.

BBC News - Beach users told to cover up in Newquay Tesco branch

last year during June, we spent 2 or 3 days in the Atlantic Hotel and enjoyed our stay, we used the hotel as a base for touring.

called into a pub just down the road from the hotel....cant remember its name, it was ok ish

.