Ribber's psychological support

batfalcon · 24 October 2002, 18:21

There are many guys out there who have plenty of time to enjoy ribbing, thus having no other commitments, launch their boats and have fun.
On the other hand, there are as many who simply can not do that.
My personal "problem" is that even though my wife and I have time to spend on weekends, in fact we are forbidden of such fun because we have to support our daughters studying. They have many dificult lessons that keep them occupied till 23.00 or more.

As you understand it's rather unusual to find free time for ribbing, even on weekends.

How do / did face this situation guys / ladies ?

Just showing patience perhaps ?

Brian · 24 October 2002, 18:55

Michael
Just so we understand the problem.
You presumably work Monday to Friday-all during the day.
Evenings and weekends are spent doing normal family things, plus more importantly supporting your daughter in her studies. Thus no "half-days" are available for RIBing.
Is this the problem?

batfalcon · 24 October 2002, 19:03

You have put your finger on it. And it's not one daughter. We've got 2 (twins), so the trouble gets double.

Brian · 24 October 2002, 19:06

I will sleep on your problem.

batfalcon · 24 October 2002, 19:11

Sleep on my problem ?
Meaning zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz ?????

Brian · 25 October 2002, 11:15

OK, I have an idea.

Firstly, you must not treat a fact as a problem. Problems can be solved, facts cannot.
So if it is a fact that you can't go boating yet, don't get frustrated.

I, personally, have always found that AT LEAST 50% of my boating enjoyment is involved in the planning and preparation. The anticipation, the excitement, the imagination of what it will be like.

So my idea.

Why don't you get the family together and agree a weekend date maybe some 2,3 or 4 months away. Agree that from at least the Saturday afternoon right through till Sunday afternoon will be a boating expedition. Make sure everybody buys into the idea, makes reservations in their diaries and don't book the date for something else.

Your expedition is to go from you normal boat launch point to, say, one of your off-shore islands. You will stay overnight. Maybe call at another island, Sunday morning to see something specific, and then return to base leaving enough time to recover before Monday starts.

You then spend a lot of time in the detail planning.
If you have a computer at home get some navigation software. Plan the route in detail. Allow for contingencies and Plan B. Research the islands, accommodation, your sightseeing point etc.
This planning work can absorb your mind and build anticipation for the "Great Weekend".
If you think this idea is workable then, if you give me a map reference of where you launch, I will buy some charts and help you via e-mail, if you wish.

I find the winter months in England, time tends to drag if you have bad weather. I have planned a trip from the south coast of England to the south of Ireland and then around the S/W corner of Ireland and up as far as the Aran Islands. I planned this TWO YEARS Ago. I still haven't been yet!! Bad weather, a broken arm and lack of crew have forced me to delay. But I will go one day, I have promised myself.

I hope this helps.

batfalcon · 25 October 2002, 11:59

That's the only way to face it. Indeed I do the same thing. Not so much planning and everything, since the kids are on the 1st grade of high school, but basically the same.
And all these plans led me to the conclusion that we work 11 months a year to LIVE only 1.

Mpououou

Manos · 25 October 2002, 12:21

Is that an excuse for not going RIBing in Greece every weekend or you just geting old

Charles · 25 October 2002, 12:25

Brians Agony Aunt Column ?!

I agree with everything you said Brian - the other option, which I find works really well is to be TOTALLY spontaneous. At the breakfast table just announce - 'Get you stuff together, we are going camping in Herm tonight' . Before the family can start thinking of other things, you are on your way with all the excitement on board.

thewavehumper · 25 October 2002, 13:16

I just wrote a lengthy reply to you and accidentally pressed the escape key and it's gone. So heres a shorter version.

I presume your kids are studying Chemistry, Biology, Physics, Needlework, Greek, History, Geography, English, It and hopefully Welsh and some other stuff as well.

Talk to your kids teachers and explain the problem you have and ask them if they think there is any way the homework could involve ribbing . I am thinking a science project could involve the physics of planing , how an outboard works, The chemical reaction of petrol what marine life is around the Athens coastline.

Or on a less sophisticated level how an anchor works , Nav lites and stuff

Greek language could be satisfied with an essay on the wekend
Histry could be take care of my a visit to a histroic site mayb ewhere archimeded built his ships battle Claw/ Crane

IF you can't involve IT and Boats then your just not trying cad cam is used to design a pennant

they can make you a Ribnet burgee in Neddlework

Geography could be a bit harder, as i would suggest a weather study but the weather is always the same boring beutiful idyllic summy calm suff apart from thos 6 days a year that it isn't.

Don't worry about Welsh as it's doesn't have any commercial value really.

Anyway that's my suggestion failing that I guess Brians Tantric Planning would work! Give it a go, but if the teachers don't like it I am not staying in after school!

Ok Brian I'll volunteer for your crew, when are we going!

cheers
Stuart

Manos · 25 October 2002, 13:26

GREAT STAFF

But still think is that all of us married people don't go RIBing so often is because we are getting on!!! LOLOL
Or shall I speak just for my self??
Manos

batfalcon · 25 October 2002, 13:29

Quote:

Originally posted by THEWAVEHUMPER

Talk to your kids teachers and explain the problem you have and ask them if they think there is any way the homework could involve ribbing. I am thinking a science project could involve the physics of planing , how an outboard works, The chemical reaction of petrol what marine life is around the Athens coastline.

O

And French too !!
That's the spirit Stuart. I DO LIKE THIS PLAN, exept the fact that all the teachers are mountaineers

Manos,

Don't tell ME about getting old

I'm not a bachelor being in Athens

thewavehumper · 25 October 2002, 14:13

Then explain the large mountainous Waves to the teachers

If you still can't get it together then I'll come over and drive your RIB for you so at least it doesn't get bored

cheers
Stuart

Brian · 25 October 2002, 14:43

Stuart
Next window is likely to be late Spring 2003.
Let's keep in touch-would be thrilled to have you aboard.
Brian

dbillyboy · 25 October 2002, 15:49

I have a similar problem. I cannot get out in my SIB as often as I like because it means I have to leave the wife to look after my disabled boy Robert. It makes me feel guilty leaving her to cope however I know that I need time off. The only saving grace is that Peter my youngest likes the boat and nags me to go out but it is difficult.

Brian · 26 October 2002, 15:12

Charles
Love the idea of a totally spontaneous "lets go for it approach". I am sure it works with your terrifically well adjusted family.
Wouldn't work with mine though.
Oh, we would get to Herm OK, specially with me at the wheel, BUT.........
when we get there..
THE WIFE will have forgotten the tents and camping kit
THE KIDS will have forgotten the food (and more importantly, my booze!)
I will have remembered a vital meeting with my Bank Manager THIS VERY AFTERNOON
And we will receive a tearful mobile phone call from our youngest, asking why we left him on the refueling dock and don't we love him anymore?

Charles · 26 October 2002, 16:24

Brian
It cannot be that bad. Someone like you who has run a huge empire - don't believe a word of it.

Keith Hart · 26 October 2002, 18:07

Quote:

Someone like you who has run a huge empire

Empire? Ruddy hell! First we have JK as GOD. Now we have Brian the Emperor.

Any more Deities, Dictators, Despots, Moguls, Aristocrats or members of The Royal Family hiding out there?

David Manning - Duke of Dudley?

Keith (Your most humble and obedient servant) Hart

batfalcon · 27 October 2002, 17:38

There are some noblemen among us.
Didn't you notice the blazon on my A frame ?

Pete7 · 27 October 2002, 18:14

Blazon ? what like grey flannels and blazons with embroidered badges on the pocket ? What with burgies and shirts we will have a committee next and be meeting in the RYA hosiptality tent at boat shows.